The history of Valentine’s Day appears to date back to ancient Rome and the feast of Lupercalia where there was lots of nudity and “hitting” on of women, (check out this super interesting article by NPR – The Dark Origins of Valentine’s Day). February 14th has been renamed and celebrated in a variety of ways over the centuries and it has morphed into what it is now, a highly commercialized time to celebrate romance, love and friendships. A time for Hallmark cards and children’s hand print cards, heart shaped candy, flowers and expensive jewelry. It is celebrated between lovers, spouses, parents and children. And, thanks to the television show Parks & Recreation, and the always adorable Leslie Knope, GALentine’s Day is celebrated by half of my Instagram followers, according to a very scientific poll I conducted on my IG story with the “polls” feature. With Valentine’s Day upon us, and all this talk about love, it’s interesting to note, that not everyone receives love the same way. I think on some level I always knew this, but it didn’t really hit home until I ran across a little treasure that can change your relationships with your spouse, your children, your parents and siblings, and even your friends and co-workers. The 5 Love Languages developed by Gary Chapman has been around for 25 years, and I wish I had know about it for that long! This is a theory that assumes everyone receives love and feels love in one of 5 Love Languages. There is a simple online quiz you can take and it will determine your Love Language, or the way you best receive love from others. Your Love Language will be one of the following:
February 4, 2019
Tales of A Self Care Martyr
I admittedly play the martyr when it comes to self-care. It became a bad habit early in my life when I gave everything I had to my husband, children, work, house, volunteering, you name it. I did it all, and excelled in it. And poor, poor, pitiful me. I never had time to take care of myself. As I look back now, and become my own Monday morning therapist, I can see it was me trying to prove my love to my family and say “Look at me, look at all I do for YOU. Aren’t I the best wife, mother, employee? No one can be as good at this as me!” That’s the #3 Enneagram in me…needing validation. Can you tell I’m just a little obsessed with the Enneagram? I digress. So, in this new stage of my life, I am focusing a little more on self-care, and being less of a martyr. It’s really not a good look on me anyway, so time to let it go. But, here is my struggle with all of the typical self-care routines many women swear by:
January 23, 2019
100 Days: Little Wins That Turn into Something Bigger
My name is Susan, and I’m a recovering Diet Coke addict. It’s been 100 days since my last sip of that delicious nectar of the Gods. I started drinking Diet Coke right after it launched in 1982 and I never stopped. At my worst, right before I quit, I was drinking 4-6 cans a day, and if I happened by a QuikTrip, I’d get a Big Q fountain DC as well. I would easily go through two twelve-packs a week. Y’all, I estimate I spent at least $400 a year in Diet Coke. I’m not stupid, I know how bad DC is for you…chock full of nasty stuff. But I couldn’t resist the feel of an ice cold fountain Diet Coke sliding down my throat. Heaven. I’ve quit Diet Coke too many times to count, never lasting more than two weeks, probably caved we went out for Mexican food. I had to have a Diet Coke with Mexican food. It would be un-American not to. It’s refreshing deliciousness called me back time and again. Then, I started Rachel Hollis’s #Last90Days Challenge in October. She challenged us to do 5 small daily things, what she called 5 to Thrive:
January 7, 2019
Happy National Thank God it’s Monday Day!
Today is National Thank God it’s Monday Day, which is my kind of day, because I love Mondays! I am unapologetically THAT girl! So annoying, right? I haven’t always been a Monday loving gal. I used to roll my eyes at people like me. Such a Pollyanna. What is she part of a Disney movie? Ugh! Stay away, I don’t want your sugar sweet syrupiness getting on me. Just bring me a cup of coffee, for the love of God, it’s MONDAY! When I worked for a large corporation and had to put on a navy, black or grey skirted suit with pantyhose and sensible heels, not flats, not stilettos, no peep-toes….I was not a fan of Mondays. When my husband traveled and I had to get the kids up, ready, drop them off at daycare all by myself, I was not a fan of Mondays. At all. I always liked my job and the people I worked with, and of course, I loved my kids, but Mondays were just part of the grind for me. And, I didn’t like it. Truth be told, I was a different person back then. I wasn’t always content with my life, I was more often than not in a negative frame of mind, looking at what I didn’t have rather than all the wonderful things I did have. So, hating Mondays was just part of who I was at that stage in my life. Geesh…that’s sad. Today is National Thank God it’s Monday Day, which is my kind of day, because I love Mondays! I am unapologetically THAT girl! So annoying, right? I haven’t always been a Monday loving gal. I used to roll my eyes at people like me. Such a Pollyanna. What is she part of a Disney movie? Ugh! Stay away, I don’t want your sugar sweet syrupiness getting on me. Just bring me a cup of coffee, for the love of God, it’s MONDAY! When I worked for a large corporation and had to put on a navy, black or grey skirted suit with pantyhose and sensible heels, not flats, not stilettos, no peep-toes….I was not a fan of Mondays. When my husband traveled and I had to get the kids up, ready, drop them off at daycare all by myself, I was not a fan of Mondays. At all. I always liked my job and the people I worked with, and of course, I loved my kids, but Mondays were just part of the grind for me. And, I didn’t like it. Truth be told, I was a different person back then. I wasn’t always content with my life, I was more often than not in a negative frame of mind, looking at what I didn’t have rather than all the wonderful things I did have. So, hating Mondays was just part of who I was at that stage in my life. Geesh…that’s sad.
December 31, 2018
A Weekend with No Kids: What I thought would happen vs what actually happened!
I don’t know about you, but I love the week between Christmas & New Year’s Day! These are the best days; the preparation and work for Christmas and all the celebrations are complete; I don’t really care what the house looks like, cleaning is unimportant; there’s still plenty of food in the fridge (SO.MUCH.FOOD), therefore, cooking is optional; I’m not a post-Christmas sale shopper and avoid the crowds. This is a perfect time for enjoying time together, sleeping in, playing family games and just hanging out! When any of my kids are home, I just want to put all mundane things aside and spend time with them, because I know that time is fleeting and soon, they will be gone and I can get back to the task of day to day life. And, that’s exactly what we did until the weekend when all 4 of my children had other plans! What is this madness? My two daughters went out of town for my oldest daughters Bachelorette Weekend, my oldest son and his wife had to go out of town unexpectedly, so my youngest son stayed at their house to dog sit. Mark and I had the weekend and the house to ourselves. This was going to be a great test run for when we are legitimate empty nesters and my youngest leaves for college in August!
December 24, 2018
Three traditions I don’t miss (but secretly do miss) with adult children at Christmas.
Christmas is here! Santa is coming tonight! And when your kids grow up, this time of year is a little bit different. It’s a little mellower, and little more relaxing, and I like it. I like it a lot. But I miss the crazy too. Here’s some things I don’t miss, but also miss about Christmas with adult children: