Plot Twist

Three years ago, I started this blog in anticipation of becoming an empty nester, knowing I needed to figure out the next calling in my life. For 30 years, my calling had been “Mom”. And I loved that calling. I was very good at that calling. Andy Stanley’s quote “Your greatest contribution to the kingdom of God may not be something you do but someone you raise” was my mantra. Three years ago, when I anticipated all four kids would be grown and independent at any moment, I envisioned traveling with my husband, learning new skills, going back to school, walking naked around my house, eating popcorn for dinner, and maybe even writing a book!

Little did I know that my next chapter was going to have a killer plot twist. At midnight on January 1, 2022, as I rang in the new year, I found myself single at 55 years old and a twice-over divorcee. Whoa – a year earlier I had not anticipated that. Now, the first words I speak each day are to my daughter’s pug, Mowgli. I get lonely. It’s hard to cook for one when I had previously cooked for six people for over twenty years. I work remotely from my home office and some days the only reason I leave my house is to walk Mowgli. That’s been the tough stuff.

But perhaps the biggest plot twist of all is I LOVE THIS NEW LIFE! I’m obsessed with my new home and finding all the right pieces of furniture and décor. My look is boho, mid-century modern, splash of farmhouse, and a smidge of dog hair. I’ve lost weight in the last six months because I have decided to stop eating my feelings and get off my ass. I bought a brand-new car, and the only consideration was “what do I want”? I have my very own power tools and can switch out the bits in my power drill at lightning speed. I have pink bamboo sheets and a marble nightstand with a lampshade made of pink feathers. I keep my heater at 62 degrees at night because I’m 55 years old and … menopause. I do get lonely, but lonely because you are alone is so much different than lonely when you are married.

I’m not proud to say I have had two marriages that didn’t work. Honestly, I held on to the last marriage longer than I should have simply because I didn’t want to “fail”. What does that say about me? What will people think? But a good friend of mine told me that it’s not failing, it’s simply auto-correcting a decision that I made in good faith with the best information I had at the time. I’ll take that! I am ok with being in the process of auto-correction in several areas of my life.

I have learned valuable lessons in my 55 years, and the best one that I have finally learned is to stop letting life happen and start making life happen. I am a huge believer in holding myself accountable and not blaming others. I know I am where I am in my life because of all the little and big decisions I made along the way. And honestly, most of the decisions I made were considering other people and their wants and needs. And while that is not necessarily a bad thing, it was bad when I completely disregarded what I wanted and needed. Being a martyr is not pretty. Being a martyr is self-destructive. Why was I like that? I don’t know, but I’m tired of being that woman. I am going to put myself first so I can heal. I will live my life on my terms. I will enter this new chapter whole and healthy both mentally and physically. I’m not there yet, but I’m working on it daily.

I have decided the first step on this journey to being the best me I can be is to go on my own little (or big) Next Chapter Best Chapter Road Trip. There are six states in the U.S I have never visited. (Idaho, Alaska, Montana, North Dakota, Wisconsin, and Hawaii.) And beginning on March 5, 2022, Mowgli and I are hitting the road for a 4-month road trip to complete my 50 States bucket list. Well, except for Hawaii – that’s for later in 2022. I’ll be staying with friends and family along the way, and I have rented a few Airbnbs and hotels. I’ll also be working full time and continuing to work my two side gigs. I hope to reconnect with old friends I haven’t seen in years and even decades. I want to see and experience new things. I want to spend time outside in God’s beauty, doing my version of Eat, Pray, Love. There may even be a tattoo or more in my future, AND…I’ll be working on me.

I’d love for you to ride shotgun with me on my journey through what will likely be 25 states and over 7,500 miles as I work on Susan 2.0! Stick with me and I will get into the nitty-gritty of how the decisions I have made over the years led me to this place in life. I’ll be posting here at least weekly, sharing things I learned, saw, and experienced on the road. Maybe through my experiences, something will resonate with you and give you the courage to try something new or make a different decision. And maybe you’ll just be entertained. Either way, I’d love to have you along for the ride.

For more real-time content, you can follow me on Instagram and TikTok, I’ll be looking for recommendations and feedback on all the things you think I should experience along the way! And, if you are in my path or even a little off my path, let’s connect!

The countdown begins! Thirty days from today I’ll be heading down the road, searching for my next plot twist!

Hope you join me and Mowgli!